Tuesday, October 07, 2014
I don't know how many would read this. If you do and it helped in some way or another, maybe you can drop a comment on that ancienct cbox somewhere on this blog.
I have a strong urge to blog again - to write out all my feelings that I have bottled up in my heart. You know I've so much pent up feelings, that I start thinking it's God's fault for staking the claims so high. It seemed so unreachable. And it often left us frustrated because of that. But then did we remember God's purpose and what He set out to do? Did He send His Son Jesus Christ to die on the cross for us just so the entire world will be condemned? No. He did that to save the world He love!
So why the high standards then? How is it different from what is expected of you by the other 'idols'? I think the most distinct difference is where love comes in. Jesus died on the cross for us because of His love. It was given freely to all who believed in Him 2000+ years ago, where I believe all of us reading this hasn't been born yet. Love came in first. Whereas for the other 'idols', usually you got to do something first before you get 'their love' in return.
So what about this love is so important? Our God is our Daddy God. He sets high standards for us because He loves us. But that doesn't mean He just left the standards there and leave us to reach it on our own. He guides us, shapes us, mould us, if only we allow Him to. If we don't follow His voice and wander off like lost sheeps, or following other lost sheeps, we will only end up in dangerous situations, possibly results in us getting hurt in some way or another - whether it's physically or emotionally.
I've drifted away from what I originally intended to say. Let's get back to it now. I believe many Christian girls have probably heard of guarding your heart, and really waiting on God to put the (perfect) guy in your life. Yes God wants the best for you and He will only give you nothing but the best. But does that mean if the guy isn't perfect, he's not the best that God gives you? How do you measure perfectness then? By how Godly He is? So every girl should wait for a church leader, a missionary, or someone that holds a high position in the church, is it? Ohh.. Maybe the guy's Godly in other ways, like doing devotions everyday, serving the Lord in His own ways.. And the list goes on and on.
I apologise for sounding sarcastic in the few lines before. But does it seemed like now girls have began to be judges? To be fair, of course not all of them, but if you're looking at spiritual maturity this way, then probably you're missing out on some other stuff. Of course the fruits of the spirit - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control - will be hanging all over the tree as a person matures. But are you only looking for brightly coloured large fruits? What about those that are small and tiny that are in the process of growing? Surely they might not be very eye catchy, but they still do deserve some attention don't they?
I think it takes both parties to continue together towards Christ.
"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:21-33 NIV)"
The above 13 verses shouldn't be quoted out of context and used to force any party into submission. I think that clearly explains the ultimate goal of all couples, and that's only possible through love - the love that stems out from Christ's love for us.
One last quote from an article I read to end it off:
"We throw around certain phrases, coating them with so-called faith, when really, often they are just rooted in fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of mistakes. Fear of getting it wrong. Fear that we don’t know enough about relationships."
Read more at http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/5-christianese-relationship-cliches-stop-using#qkto4Hs3LQwgKcDS.99
I think it's really a good article that sums up how I feel about this.
May we continue to walk closer to God.
Just my two cents.
2:42:00 pm
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
So many changes in my life now, so many things on my plate. I really need to learn how to control myself. I pray for self discipline, self control, and wisdom in prioritising which is more important and which is not. Only by putting our Lord God as first, then the other stuff will fall into place. May I not get drifted away when I have important stuff to do. May I not shun from work and do all sorts of things just out of impromptu. It's time to settle myself down.
May God lead the way and I will just follow.
2:28:00 am
Thursday, July 10, 2014
I'm posting! I'm actually posting! At 3.21AM -.- Old habits really die hard. Lord when will I be able to fully curb the temptation of staying up late? Maybe I really like the fact that when it's dark and the whole world, okay maybe the whole Singapore seems to be sleeping and everything is quiet, then I can "work" better. I'm not even working at all lor. -.-
I wonder why recently I'm getting back my feeling of blogging. Am I going back to the me back before 2010? It seems like.. Sigh I never got to finish the post.
Who am I?
Still the same emo guy.
4:35:00 am
Thursday, July 04, 2013
A note.. Who writes a note on facebook these days? I don't know the answer to the question, and I don't even know who will be reading this note. All I know is that God left an impression in my heart for me to write down what I have experienced during the three days at Batam Mission Trip here..
This is long overdue, so perhaps my memory might fail me. But I pray that God might refresh my memory to the events that He wants me to share, and may every word I type here not come from me, but from Him and only Him alone. All this I pray, in the mighty Name of our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen! =D
I also don't know what prompted me to go for the Batam Mission Trip. All I know was that I was extremely excited for it after knowing that there will be one through the Speedlight leaders whatsapp group, and that was way before it was confirmed and announced in church. Perhaps not being able to go for the OCIP to Yogyakarta, Indonesia back in 2010 due to the Mount Merapi volcano eruption has something to do with it. Thinking back, imagine what would have happened if the volcano decided to erupt some time later, while we were there?? Thank God we weren't there at that time. Anyway, back to the mission trip. As usual, I excitedly asked Sandra whether she could go as well, and she said she wasn't sure as she might need to go back to school for meetings during the holidays. I managed to persuade her to just sign up for it together with me, and if sadly she isn't able to make it, we can swoop places with someone else who's interested in going but hasn't signed up. Thank God nothing clashed with the dates of the mission trip.
However, it wasn't all smooth sailing before the mission trip. Sandra and I, just like any other couple, had our fair share of arguements, and at some points it got really bad, till I almost didn't know how to go for the mission trip with her anymore. As this was a first mission trip for me, I have no idea (until a later time that is) this was actually part of satan's plan to keep us from going for the mission trip. Had we not gone for it, we might have just missed out so much of what God is trying to do in our lives.
One day before the mission trip, well, not surprisingly, I have not packed for the mission trip yet. I was never good with packing, and hence I took a long long time to pack - all the way to the wee hours of the night. I slept late, so the next day it was totally crazy in trying to wake up to take train to harbour front ferry terminal. So I got Sandra to get a cab from her house and come over to my house to pick me up before going to harbour front ferry terminal together. Guess what? I forgot that my wallet had very little SGD left and Sandra usually doesn't carry much cash around! And we're on a cab which doesn't allow payment via anything else except cash! Although there was signs on the cab saying that they accept ez link card payments, through my bad experiences I know they don't, so I thought I would play it safe and whatsapp the other leaders in woodlands to see whether they have spare cash that I can borrow, long before we reached harbour front. Well, no one saw the message I believed, and no one answered the calls when our cab reached. Thank God, that with every cent (quite a few 5 cent coins) in our wallets, we managed to make up very close to the cab fare (Praise God! =D) and thank God the cab driver was nice enough to let us off, and even apologise for not being able to accept any other forms of payment! =D
So we met up with the others, collect our boarding passes, wait wait and wait and we're off to Batam. I tried to sleep on the ferry and on the bus to the hotel, but I didn't manage to for some unknown reasons. We arrived at the hotel and we had praise and worship session. By then, I wasn't that much alert already, so it didn't got into me much when the two Pastors (can't remember whether is it them or someone else) mentioned that satan might try to sabotage our mission trip. At the back of my mind, I just thought maybe satan will use the weather (haze included) or something like that to sabotage, so I just prayed for the weather together with the group.
After a not so filling lunch (well no complaints since we're on a mission trip, not some 5 star holiday eh? Plus I set with a table full of guys), we set off in our respective teams to the church. At that point of time, I still had no idea why Sandra and I ended up in the visitation team. I still remember during the briefing on 11th May, I was wondering how come Sandra's name and my name were not included together with the rest of the speedlighters, and only to find out later we're in the visitation team together with the other adults! =O We're the only non adult team (technically we're still under 21), and the closest was Alina and Wilbur's team but they definitely have much more experience than the both of us. I wasn't very sure what to expect so I held Sandra's hand and we prayed together about the visitation.
We were blessed to have Pastor Iskandar and his brother Calvin as our interpreter. We went to our first house, which was a Muslim house. They didn't have a very nice house - no furnitures, and it was incomplete as they did not have enough funds to complete it. Though they might be poor, the impresson that I got from them is that they are very rich in spirit. Despite being Muslims, they are open to being prayed for, which we did for them. Perhaps they might just want the blessings, or have other reasons for not accepting Christ, but I know God has sown His seeds in them, and I pray that they might come to Him in His perfect timing. Oh and they have a son who's doing very well in his studies in school (third in class or something like that). He has a dream of coming to Singapore to further his studies. I pray that God will provide him with a way to further his studies in Singapore, and may his passion to excel will not be extinguished by his financial situations.
The second home we went to was slightly better off. They were a Christian family. The husband was a Christian and because the wife married him, she became a Christian as well. Praise God that she grew to in Christ and even opens her house for cell group. However, sadly her husband backslided and started giving excuses to not attend church. The husband wasn't around when we visited and the wife shared that she has been praying for him, and we prayed for the him and the family as well. Thinking back now, it reminds me how easy it is to lose our way even though we might claim to be Christians. The devil will always be there to whisper to you lies so as to lure you away from the Shepherd, so we must constantly listen to His voice so that we can follow Him and walk with Him closely.
Third family was a Catholic family. They seemed pretty good to me compared to the other two (Praise God! =D). Nothing much I remember from this family, except this small girl who's so shy and refused to let Sandra lay hands on her to pray for her healing. We still prayed for her though. =D
And then came the movement back to hotel and then preparation for the night service. Some things happened and we got delayed, but thank God it was ultimately resolved! =D The service was awesome! =D We had quite a big venue, and initially I was quite worried. I kept looking back (we were sitting in the first few rows), and the numbers that were there were quite disappointing. We barely filled half the seats available. I kept praying for more people to come but seems like no one else came. When Pastor Barb finished preaching the message, and there was an altar call, no one came up. My heart kind of sank.. Oh no! No one at all! I was quite disappointed at that time, but I thought we still have the healing message. So when Pastor Rachel went up and asked whether there's anyone with a sickness in need of prayer to step up, again no one.. If you remember I was quite exhausted throughout the day, and at that time I had a huge headache. But thank God Pastor Rachel mentioned something, that we have to claim healing through our spoken words as well. So I just kept saying I have no headache and I am not tired and without me realising, the headache and tiredness just seemed to disappear! =D Thank God!!! =D
I can't remember what exactly Pastor Rachel mentioned again, but people started walking up to the front. I'm not the kind of person who usually takes the initiative most of the time in an unfamiliar environment but I don't know why I just walked up and started to prayed for a guy, just like what I was told to do. Thinking back, it seems to invoke some deja vu feeling. It's just like how I asked Sandra, "eh now altar call ah?" And then I started walking down the stairs to the front and received Christ back in 2010! =D I have never prayed for someone in that kind of setting before. I just prayed and prayed in tongues and the guy just started trembling and shaking and crying and.. yea you get it. The pastors kept walking around me and even talked to the guy, most probably because they saw how he was reacting and afraid I couldn't handle it. Thank God I just prayed and prayed, in tongues and in English, and worshipped Jesus as the song comes along. It was so awesome as I felt God's presence so strongly, so overwhelmingly.
After the service things happened, and one of them I only got to know after returning to my room. Thank God for the mini praying and sharing session in my 'apartment' with the rest of the guys. Never heard anyone else mentioning specifically about how satan creeps in and spoils our plans until then. It's really a good reminder that we're constantly in a spritual warfare with the devil. "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood,but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." (Ephesians 6:12) Therefore, we constantly need God to help us fend off the enemy!
The next day was pretty much the same so I shall skip the morning part. Visitation again, and this time we got Novela as our interpreter. We went to our first house, and it was a Chinese old grandmother. Sandra and I were kind of shock when suddenly she said "jiang hua yu" (speak Chinese) these three words. So we ended up conversing with her in Chinese. She shared with us her life story, and how she came to becoming a Muslim just because she claimed that a mosque was nearyby her house and there wasn't a church nearby. God prompted me to share with her the stories about my maternal grandparents, and how they came to Christ. So both Sandra and I shared and shared, but she refused to even let us pray for her. Oh well.. But I can sense that she understands what Sandra and I shared about the love, grace and mercy of God, but there's still a bit of resistance. I know that God has sown a seed in her heart and I pray for a harvest to be in God's perfect timing. The old lady was very welcoming, which kind of reminded me of what most old people wants - company. Someone to talk to and visit them would be good enough. And God is the only one who will be ALWAYS there for them and will never be "too busy" for them.
As we spent too long in our first house, the parents of the second and third house was not around. I was a little disappointed but we got to pray together with the kids from the third house. =D And then we got back and prepared for night service.
We had a surprise awaiting us when we reach the venue for the night service. This time round it was at the place where they held their service. Oh gosh there was a blackout! The power was off and we gathered as a church and started praying. We prayed and we trusted God and we sang worship songs as the Spirit guides us. It got dark and we kept praying and praying. The power didn't come back on and it was getting late. Someone suggested shifting the service to the 'carpark' outside where we lay newspapers and the headlights of the car was used as lighting. I was helping out to lay the newspapers when suddenly I heard screams of joy! THE POWER HAS RETURNED!! =D HALLELUJAH!! =D =D I was still in my blur state when I looked at the lights and it took seconds for me to register that "OH! There was a blackout just now!" Haha it just seemed too normal for me to see the lights on. Anyway, it's really a lesson to not run ahead of God. God has His own plans, and it doesn't always coincide with ours. Just like we might think it's too late, God doesn't think so, so it's really important to hear His voice! =D The service was awesome just like the night before and this time round Sandra was praying for a girl and since I had nobody to pray for, I prayed for her as well while standing behind Sandra.
Throughout this mission trip, I really learnt a lot. Thank God that He prompted me to type this out. It actually reminded me of the lessons I learnt, which I think I conveniently forgot most of them. I just want to say I feel the youths there in Batam really express out their feelings for God! Yes it might be a personal relationship with God but I feel that when we come together as a congregation to worship God, there isn't a need to feel shy or be reserved. We could just bask in God's joy together! =D Thank God for this awesome mission trip! =D I look forward to more mission trips and experiences with God! =D HALLELUJAH! =D God Bless! =D
6:29:00 am
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Procrastination hit home again.. Can't believe it.. Ever since my last post which is on my ORD date, I haven't achieved much - probably except getting tuition assignments (thank God for them!!) and going for them! Have been really really unproductive these days. I kept thinking of changing all these but my willpower is really really weak! I think it has fallen to a state far worse then anything possibly imagined.. The fact that I am here typing my blog when I have many other stuff to do and the due dates are not inching nearer but flying faster than the speed of light (3.0 x 10^8 m/s <= work hazard, although not been doing much work anyway) towards me. Where do I spend all my time, you might ask. I guess you'll have to ask God how I've been spending away all these time!! I think even if I have 48 hours a day wouldn't be enough. On second thoughts, it might be a good thing.. Stop dreaming.. -.-
Dreams will remain as dreams unless you do something about them.
Somebody, help?
2:52:00 am
Tuesday, March 05, 2013
I seriously wonder who still visits my blog. I came here because I wanted to try out a job that requires you to write blogs and they're asking for a link to my works. Well, this is the only so called 'works' I have. Haha. I think God wants me to come here, although I have no idea why at this time and I have to wake up quite early later. I think it's really a good idea to have Christian songs posted here. Just by having it auto play soothes my soul - so much that I just feel that I'm at peace, even though I'm kind of sweating because of the weather and really kind of tired..
Oh well, what have I been doing so far? Good question.. Really want to kick away the lazy habit and get some self control and start moving on the things I really wanted to do. I can see myself improving bit by bit though (Thank God!!!). Well, I'm not trying to be ego or anything, but I can really sense God's trying to shape my life up bit by bit. At times, I really wish I can be a changed man like immediately, but come to think of it, God really has His perfect timing. All I should do now is to wait for Him to teach me, step by step.. Can't wait to see what He has planned for me! So excited!! =D =D
Haha and I gave up wanting to have every month as archive. It just seemed so impossible to fill in the gap now (laziness acting up again =X). And I would never ever figure out that my new blog url (yes it's different and I have the old link redirect you here) would actually reminds me of how God changed me - from a new born to an infant and now perhaps, a toddler or maybe even a small kid (haha i hope)? Haha. Still got a long way to go!! God help me!!! =D
That's all I guess.. Till next time!
Miracles DO exist!! And they're all from our Almighty God!!! =D =D =D
God's awesome grace.. Overwhelmed.
3:29:00 am
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Woah I'm back to blogging again! Hahaha though I don't know whether this will be the first and last post but I guess it won't be cause later I'll post one post per month to catch up on the months that I've not posted! Guess I'm sort of a perfectionist in this way because I like to have every single month in my archives! Haha actually I also don't know why I am so particular about that but I just like it that way! =P Okay anyway, as requested by SOMEONE (hahaha =P), I'm going to announce to the whole wide world (actually just those who are reading this now) that I have a tumblr!! =D =D
Haha it's actually a tumblr co-owned with my girlfriend (and yes I do have one! And it's for you to find out who! =P), and the URL is right here!
My Tumblr! =D
It's actually more of a Christian tumblr (yea I'm a Christian for quite some time already if you still haven't realised! =D) and most of the time my girlfriend is the one updating it! Really too much stuff to do le!! But I pray that I'll have the discipline and the time to plan out everything nicely so that I won't waste my time and I would maximize my time!! =D
Okay I think this should be all for now! =D If you want to know more about what happened the past few months, please read on the posts below! Enjoy!! =D
The biggest room in the entire world is the room for improvement!! =D
Jiayou and God bless!! =D =D
9:43:00 pm
Sunday, November 06, 2011
A lot of things have been happening recently! Well firstly I haven't been posted out of where I am yet because I am awaiting the start of my course. Haha shall not go into details explaining because those who know me well enough would know what I am talking about! Haha still as mysterious as ever eh? Well I guess that's me? Probably I'm just lazy..
Alright so now currently I'm stuck guarding the gym, which obviously isn't a very entertaining 'job' but oh well, I got the best offer already so I shouldn't be complaining so much! Haha. I think recently I really don't have much blogging inspiration.. Cause I really don't know what to said already.. Okay till next time! =D
Sometimes it's really hard to make decisions when you're stuck at too many crossroads - it becomes a maze!Stuck.. =X
9:44:00 pm
Monday, October 17, 2011
Alright finally is October! =D Haha this is the 4th post i am typing now already, and the first one with the actual date! The posts are getting longer and longer. Maybe i'm getting the 'feel' back for blogging. Wonder whether this post would be longer than the rest. Hmm..
If you are wondering why am i suddenly so free today, it's actually because ever since the day i came back to Singapore, which was stated in my last post, i have actually been quite 'free'. In simple terms, I have lots of time on hand to spare but i don't really have the chance to do what i want to do because i'm trapped in this place. But thank God for the computer here which actually i have no idea what i could really do here for more than 8 hours a day. Any ideas? Haha. Thank God despite all these at least now i get to go home everyday, which is awesome! =D
But come tomorrow i have no idea where i will be posted to and when! In fact, i may know the results of my posting today but i rather not to. I'm actually praying hard that i will not be posted out so soon but for the next batch instead of tomorrow. Those of you on the ball ones should know where will i be going if i actually get posted out tomorrow, haha that is if you even get what i mean. I wonder why am i being so secretive here, but I have already been like that for the previous few posts so why change? Haha. Maybe i'm just lazy to explain or even sick of it because my story isn't something from the norm, and not many people know how it actually works. But oh well, if you know me, you'll know! If you don't, then too bad! =D
I really want to stay on here because i still have so much to learn, and i need time to do so!
Please God!! =X
9:51:00 am
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Touchdown! =D This was the long awaited day of returning back to Singapore! When i walked out of the airport and into my cousin's car, everything felt so surreal to me. It seemed like i instantly adapt to the life in Singapore, excluding the part where the heat plus the humidity made me feel a little stuffy. It seemed like as though i have not left Singapore at all!
Australia was wonderful, but i couldn't wait to get back because of things i miss here in Singapore. Those who are close enough to me would know what i miss! =D Anyway, the flight experience there i would say is much better than in SYFC in Singapore. The weather there was good, but dry. But i have clear horizons most of the days, which was great for visual flying! Too bad i still couldn't fully overcome the habit of traumatizing myself and building barriers to stress myself up although they were originally supposed to protect me from messing things up, which obviously it never really did. I failed the course, and i was in total shock on that day. Haha afterwards i thought it would be better for me since i don't really like the culture there anyway so might as well not stuck 10 years of my life in there.
What's next for me? SIA probably? Haha but that also depends on whether i make the cut through their interviews. But oh well, i still have a long way to go for my NS before everything else, unless i signed on again.. which is something i don't thing i'll be considering for the moment. Till the next time, God bless! =D
The number of failures does not dictate whether you succeed in life or not, but the way you pick yourself up every time after you fail does. =DRising up again!
10:10:00 pm
Sunday, August 14, 2011
This date was the date that i took off to Tamworth, Australia for my Air Grading Course (AGC) which is my pilot selection. Well i went off in a good note and quite enjoyed the process there since it was my first time being abroad for so long, only to find out that some of the things there aren't really what i have expected. For eg, the super duper poor 3G and internet connection plus how expensive things are there. I guess i shall elaborate more of that in my next post! =D
When environment changes, your lifestyle got to change as well.Changes
7:50:00 pm
Sunday, July 03, 2011
Haha time to back post again! =D This date was my POP date from BMT! Finally POP-ed after the 24km route march! I remembered i was almost falling asleep already on the parade and the abrasion (shall not say where) did not help much either. But i think it was a good experience standing on the floating platform in the parade, though we are like super super far behind..
Sigh thought that might be one of my last time doing that.. but it seems like now i'm going back to more parades again! Haha some more i don't know when I am going to be doing that.
The feeling of uncertainty isn't good!When will i know?
11:11:00 am
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Ahh this is a nice date! Last book in date! =D aww i quite missed the times actually. I have more freedom now actually, but it tempts me to look forward for more. I think I haven't been adapting to it well lately.. Oh well! =X
Moving on to the next phase! =DHow will it be like?
10:00:00 pm