It's been a week since i last posted. My tagboard is still quite dead. I guess it's either everyone is busy preparing for the upcoming prelims/Os/promos/eoys and so on or people really do not understand my posts. Hmm... since when anyone does?
These days weren't easy for me to pass. In fact, there is a constant thing keep resounding in my brain, as if it's a hypnotism that sent me thinking and thinking into my own world - oblivious of what is happening around me. Can it be considered as daydreaming? Perhaps. Anyway, i have finally started doing work, not really much of studying yet, because everything is still quite in a mess, but at least that's a good start. I wonder how long that will last. o.O There's something that keep my going. That is when i dive deep into doing work, the work i am doing is predominant in my mind, and that i am 'saved' from thinking about some stuff for that period of time - that is if i could concentrate. It seems the best way of doing things.
There seems to be lots of things that i am puzzled with. All the phenomenons left me with no clue as to the reason(s) why they are happening. In the end, i will have to resort to guessing and finding stuff to be convince myself that i am right. But am i really right? I have no idea. It seems too many things are hidden from me, and the truth is concealed under many layers and layers of false information, which may end up being the truth. Nothing makes sense to me as to why they are happening. They are just happening. I know they ARE happening cause i can feel so, even though i was told it isn't. I trust my feelings on that.
I lack a sense of direction. It seems that i can only let things be as they are now. I can't do anything if i am not allowed to, so it really makes no difference whether or not i know what is going on. I am not entrusted the task of changing things anymore. Was i entrusted before or was it my own wishful thinking? No idea. There are lots and lots of unanswered question, and the list could only go on and on. As the days passed and the final day approaches, i wonder how things will turn out. =X
Will time reveal the real truth hidden deep inside your heart?Confused, but holding on! :)
3:01:00 pm