Saturday, May 30, 2009
我好怕好怕, 心里就是只有一种很不放心的感觉. 我已经很久没有在这里用华语了 - 大概有半年了吧. 我最后一次在这里用华语时, 心情大概也就是和现在差不多吧. 每当我用华语时, 都是因为... 算了. 也不是什么好事, 就不想提了. 我是多么多么的担心, 但我只能坐在这里发呆, 什么都不能做. 某人告诉我说, 根本都不是我的错, 但我自己知道, 这是因为我还没努力够, 还不能完全达到某人的信任. 就这样, 我只能在着为某人默默的祈祷, 希望某人能自己好好地照顾自己, 加油加油! :)
告诉自己, 我不能在这样了, 不能在给任何的理由. 要就不做, 要做就要做的最好, 不能让某人受到伤害, 一点儿也不行. 加油吧! :)
12:38:00 pm
Monday, May 25, 2009
Project Work SUCKS! It's really very demoralising when you put in so much effort into your project, and your idea gets rejected. I have really run out of ideas already - suck me up real dry. Yesterday when i finished my Group Project Proposal again (yes AGAIN), i was super happy. I had this feeling that i would want to really leap up in joy and shout "YES" out loud, despite i was really worn out already. I was really happy after that. It was a nice day after all until today, when i know that there might be something wrong with our Project AGAIN. This process sure is torturous, but i'm glad that there's someone to cheer me up! xD
The greatest enemy you could have is not anyone but yourself. Your main task is thus to exceed yourself.JIAYOU! xD
7:24:00 pm
Saturday, May 16, 2009
What a long day! Haha. This wasn't suppose to be my starting line just hours ago, because i was super duper happy then. However, so many things just happened, although i don't really know what, and it turned out to add to the long day i already had. But that doesn't mean i am not happy now. Overall i still am happy now. :)
I felt rather accomplished just hours ago. I think i did some significant things that made me super happy. I think the day went quite well, despite me having seriously lack of sleep. :) It was really a long day, with continuous series of events. I think i'm lazy to say what i did today ba. xP Tomorrow's another long day. Time to rest! 1.48am le sia.
The highest stage of studying is that you can study efficiently yet smiling broadly at the same time; same goes for work.No more jumping to conclusions!
11:39:00 pm
Monday, May 11, 2009
Hmm... Feeling kind of lethargic now. I think i need sleep, but once again i couldn't really go and sleep as i have work left to do. Haha. I think i need some long break to condition myself and slack a little. Now i truly get overwhelmed by all my things coming together - too many commitments already. But i made the choice myself, so i should hang on tight now, and i'm sure all the sacrifices made would be worth it! xD
Now after some physical exercise that i just went to do, i'm feeling much more awake now. I hope it won't be like nitrogen boost in the racing games that will run out so quickly - at least bring me till i sleep. Haha. :) i think i need to be more organised in my stuff so i won't be that lazy. I hope it'll work though. =X
All these aside, today was Wu Shu outing to Sentosa! :) Haha. It has been a trend that the Wu Shu J1s will organise an outing for the whole Wu Shu team somewhere during this period of time. We planned to reach at 9am, which most of the J1s did, and only to find out that most J2s will only be coming at around noon time. =.= So we proceeded on to Sentosa. I don't think i will be describing in details what we did there, but i would say that the off and on rain really dampens the spirit that is already not very strong. Overall i should say that the outing is quite enjoyable - at least i was laughing quite a significant number of times despite having super insufficient sleep. Truthfully, i was expecting more but well, this is enough for the moment. :) Okay time for work!
The person who knows you best is none other than yourself.An interesting day! xD
10:26:00 pm
Friday, May 08, 2009
Yesterday i was just fresh right in the morning, despite me having less hours of sleep compared to the night before. It went on smoothly, but of course i'm worn out at night. However, being happy sustained me. I was tired but i didn't feel tired at all. Haha. Almost wanted to blog about it when weariness attacked me and my mood started to go down. I was like feeling weird all of a sudden. Then somehow i became happy again, and my weariness, as if by some miracle, vanished! xP I strongly stress that i am NOT having any mood swings - it's just plainly because i was tired, that's all. :)
Today was rather dead, as usual. Having two lab lessons a day is really torturous, but nevertheless i survived them! During math tutorial i was rather bored already and everyone was rather dead, so i ended volunteering that i go explain the questions when Mr Wee ask for presenters - at least i have something to do rather than staring at him. :) After that during Econs make up tutorial, Ms Lee was rather kind to me when i told her i never bring. Phew. That's for continuous answering of her questions in class. :)
Now here comes the reason why my mood was totally gone before math tutorial. My phone display screen is gone!! OMG! RAH!!! Now my screen display only occasionally appears when it feel like it. And i am totally irritated by it. Haiz. I really hope i could repair it for free, if not at least at a considerably cheap price. *cross fingers*
There are a lot of wonderful things out there in life. It is because we are too focused on one aspect that we overlooked the rest. Stop. Take a step back and look at things from another point of view. Maybe you would discover something different.I just want my phone to be repaired for now. =X
5:44:00 pm
Thursday, May 07, 2009
Bless my PI and wish YOU the BEST OF LUCK for your examinations! xD
6:43:00 am
Sunday, May 03, 2009
First post in May, after not posting for quite a significant period of time. That is the problem with me. I don't put my thoughts into actions, and then sooner or later, i will forget them - now at an exceptionally fast rate as not really sure why, but my brain just tends to forget things easily. Some things continue to stay in my mind though, they will just never get out. Same goes for project work - i forget stuff if i don't write them down somewhere. Then i go ponder over it all over again - such a waste of time.
Didn't quite realise i wasn't online at all yesterday, until Jefferson asked me what happened to me over the weekend. Haha. He seemed to realise that i was always online but somehow i wasn't for the two days. Oh well. Thanks for his concern! :) I wonder whether he read my blog and will see this or not? Lols. I think i need to assert control over myself, and make my thoughts into actions as soon as possible. If not great plans will also turn out nothing because they weren't even carried out. Bleh.
Yesterday went for Simulator 5. It was 'great', 'great' time screwing it up. Thankfully the instructor that took was extremely kind, and simulators are normally not graded. I just couldn't concentrate there and then. I think perhaps i am overstressed already, much thanks to last minute preparations... AGAIN! This cannot happen for my sixth (nope, it's not going to be my last) sortie, or else it will really be the end of me in SYFC. Where's my clear mind and the energy in me? o.O *searching in progress*
Through this four months, though it may not be long, i seemed to have learn a lot, not academically, but in other areas. Don't really feel like going into details, because i don't think i can explain it well either. Bleh. xP I made many baseless conclusions, hurt people, realised i was wrong and then it all started over again. I grew to become more understanding of the situation now, and i can guess more accurately. I shall understand even further! xD
We do not learn from experiences, we learnt from processing our experiences. -John DeweyIt takes skills to do so. xP
2:38:00 pm